Wow. Hi guys.
It’s been a solid year since the last time I posted. Crazy huh? And I guess this time, it’s literally: new year, new me.
I’m sorry for those who were worried, I know a lot of people really enjoyed my writing and looked forward to every single one of my posts. I was at the peak of my blogging, my post engagement was skyrocketing, and then I just…disappeared.
In my last post I mentioned that I had gotten myself into a relationship, and therefore there was no more “content” to post because prior to that, blogging had been a creative outlet for me to vent my feelings and depressive state of mind. As soon as I got a boyfriend, I thought that life would be fun and games, it would be peaceful, I’d never shed any tears again and my heart would be always full.
Well I was totally wrong.
Long story short, we’ve split. The relationship had begun to turn sour quite early on, but I ignored all the red flags and pushed on. It was such a terrible decision on my behalf and by doing this I essentially endorsed all his inexcusable behaviour and made things even worse. It was a relief to leave the relationship and there are no hard feelings or grudges between us (I hope), so that’s a bonus. And through that relationship, I’ve definitely come out as a stronger, self-loving person- so that’s a huge bonus!
I don’t know why I felt compelled to come back here and post an update. It’s been such a long time… I don’t know if I’ll have anything to write, I don’t know if people still remember me one year on. My priorities have changed, my feelings have changed, I’m literally a new person. But I realise: I miss blogging. I miss writing out my feelings, no matter what they are. I miss the feeling of responding to comments and feeling included and loved in the WordPress community. I know that so many people loved my writing and I feel like I’ve let them down.
So here’s a small update regarding my life situation, or any new facts and information that have popped up over the past year!
- I’ve just completed my first year of university! It was a rather cruisy year with no major “study-related” dramas so all is well in that area.
- A month ago I went to Japan with Mum. It was such a rewarding experience with just us two and was so much fun! I often lie in bed and wish that if I opened my eyes, I’d be back in that small town we stayed in…
- I’ve decided to start baptismal preparation studies. FINALLY. After so many years of rejecting God and feeling so burdensome as a Christian, being in a toxic relationship finally shed light on everything that had been in the shadows my entire life. I’ve never felt more free.
- I’ve picked up the unique hobby of crocheting. I sell my things too! Please hit me up if you’re based in Australia, I’d love to help out wherever I can!
- I’m going on a music camp in just over a week! After not getting through the audition process for this year’s camp, it was so exciting to make it through for the 2020 camp.
Writing-wise, I don’t know if this post signals my return. I do have some feelings/ideas that I’d love to type out, but I haven’t written in a year, which makes it a bit rough and tough and rusty. I’ll make a decision in the next week. I am planning on removing a lot of old posts and starting afresh, so if you see some changes to my blog or a new post, that means: YES! I’M BACK! If not…this may just be an update to let you know that I do want to return, I just don’t know when and how.
Hope you all have been healthy and well, all my love ❤